Strong vs Weak - Success vs Failure



Developing mental strength is about managing your emotions and improving your ability to do so, to manage your thoughts and behave in a positive manner.

Some people have personality traits that help them think more realistically.

They, therefore, behave more positively than others.

You see this all the time on social media with Tottenham fans.

Those with mental strength look for the positives, while those with a weak mental strength look for the negative and promote the negative.

By devoting some time and energy, people can improve their mental outlook with the corresponding benefits it will then bring into their lives.

Take the man who feels nervous in social situations, perhaps with asking a woman out, a shy rather than outgoing type.

He doesn't strike up a conversation easily unless it is in the comfort of his own small social circle, whereas the more confident individual wouldn't have any qualms about interaction outside their normal social circle.

They are confident within themselves and that affects their actions.

The shy guy avoids starting conversations because of a fear of it not going well, perhaps through past experiences.

You see this with Spurs fans, a section cling to the last 20 years rhetoric, they have programmed themselves to avoid success, to harness failure.

Unless our shy chap begins a self-improvement programme then he isn't going to change and nor are our 90 minute followers.

Negativity is their comfort blanket and boy do they cling to it.

The rest of us grow up and develop.

The more our shy guy thinks about himself being awkward in social situations, the more awkward and set in his ways he becomes.

You can all see this in the 90 minute fan also, it's a self-perpetuating cycle for them.

Once you understand that your thoughts, behaviour and emotions are all linked, all working together to drag you into a dangerous downward spiral, then you can begin to reverse the process.

The difference between the positive and negative fan is that the positive fan has identified irrational thoughts and replaced them with more realistic thoughts that take into account the relevant circumstances at that time and the bigger picture.

The mentally developed suporter looks for the reasons that justify an action, whereas the negative fan doesn't, they will often ignore circumstances and context.

How do you expect a child to develop if you constantly put them down?

But that is what these 'parents' do to Spurs and call it support.

It would stunt a child, it stunts the club and players.

You really do worry for the children of these people as they are unlikely to amount to much and will not have been provided with the skills to bring up and develop children themselves.

Changing that to behave in an encouraging way and managing your emotions will bring far greater benefits and successes.

Do these people not want success?

I spoke of my fear of bees (sitting on a log with a bees nest in it), rather irrational, despite my experience and unless I did something about it, was going to stick with me for the rest of my life.

My thinking had to change.

The 90 minute fan bases his opinions on emotion, not logic.

Our heads and hearts need to work together to make effective decisions.

Heard the phrase, "I can't help the way I feel?"

Baloney, yes you can.

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The emphasis under Sir Alex Ferguson was on winning as a team.

The emphasis under Mauricio Pochettino was on winning as a team and I'm hearing the same message from player interviews about José Mourinho.

The five signings to date are, apart from their footballing abilities, there to help reshape the teams thinking.

The infusion if fresh positivity they bring will be infectious for the rest.

Teams win not only because they have superior talent but also because they have a superior mindset.

So says Bill Beswick who worked for Sir Alex Ferguson at Manchester United and who helped the England Basketball Team win a Gold Medal at the 1992 Commonwealth Games.

A positive team mindset is a powerful weapon yet we have fans bombarding them with negativity.

Illogical if you want a side to win.

A team with lesser talent can win if they have a stronger and more positive mindset, as Leicester City showed when pipping us to a Premier League title.

For a team to have a winning mindset everyone must be pulling in the same direction.

A player who doesn't want to be at a club isn't.

A player refusing to leave and sitting out their contract isn't.

This is where we want to go.

This is how we are going to get there.

This is your role in that plan.

A coach has to have every player accept those three things, if a player doesn't it diminishes the chances and if that turns to a cancerous negativity, then success isn't going to happen.

Players have to put aside personal agendas for the good of the team.

Any new signing has to buy into that BEFORE you sign them.

It is prize vs personal interest.

Too much personal interest and there will be no prize.

This is why the initial signings of Joe Hart and Pierre-Emile Højbjerg were so astute.

Their interviews show self-interest to improve or regain ability combined with the all important and overriding team ethic.

Every player within the squad must know their role and be happy with it, hence you will always need different players at different stages of their career to fulfil different roles.

A season is a long time and that shared vision must remain strong, it needs regular feeding at points throughout the season which will maintain focus on the importance of each game and each three points.

Liverpool won the Premier League because they maintained focus, they treated every game right, that it was a vital three points.

No one game was bigger than another, mentally they weren't playing the reputation of the opposition, they were playing for the three points.

The opposition was immaterial.

Operate on that mindset and you have a huge advantage.

That message is harder to instil the older a player gets.

I would ask, in our two Europa League ties, have we had that mindset, I would argue not and therein lies the problem.

Now think transfers.

A coach has to excite a potential purchase with the possibilities for achievement as a team and a development plan for the individual player.

It isn't simply a case of asking someone to come and play for you and them agreeing, you'd end up with an unmotivated bunch, all with greater self-interest than team interest and you'll win nothing.

Tottenham finished 6th, on form since Mourinho's arrival 4th.

With no Champions League, the number one criteria for players, we at least have form figures and Mourinho's track record to use as carrots.

Even here our fans try to be negative and create an air, an environment of failure and negativity through social media.

The opposite of what is required at a successful club.

The opposite of what Spurs need right now.

Right now, all that is needed is an understanding of what the club is trying to achieve this window and the context within which we are trying to achieve it.

I have no doubt we will meet our objectives and bring in the players we need to bring in to make us a challenger this season, if not a trophy winner.